Thread: Drunk related injuries?

I also liked the story of Dee falling asleep while masturbating on the toilet.
I have so many, but this is my latest big one.
After getting out of a DUI even with red wine spill stains on my white blouse and khaki shorts and the officer asking for my license, me telling him I can't find it as I am holding it in my hand, I get home (safely?) and fall backward down a flight of stairs. I broke my wrist. Had to go to the hospital where I work, still drunk and wine stained (drove myself) and didn't know enough to be embarassed. They casted me and I had to work that night (yeah it was a "day drunk" incident). I get to work probably still a little/lot drunk and realize I can't do shit because they casted my thumb and forefinger too far apart to even have a pincer grasp. I was sent home, and this is the best part, for 6weeks in the summer with pay.

My friend has an appartment over his sister's garage with no bathroom. It's downstairs. You gotta go down a latter, or outside down the stairs. Halloween, we got drunk. I had to pee and was too drunk to go down the stairs. so i went and i grabbed a cu went out on the landing and peed in the cup. While i was peeing i lost my balance and fell into the door. I ended up cracking my head open on the door knob.

Im english so anything exciting involves binge drinking, i fractured my skull in a drunken bar fight once. However i didnt go to the hospital till the next day cos i was so drunk i could feel a fucking thing!

I haven't had too many injuries. The funniest one was after my buddies wife took me into the bar's bathroom and dropped her pants to show her new tattoo. We got back to the bar and he punched me in the nose. I was too drunk to feel anything but it did bleed just a little.

What the fuck is wrong with you tranny from El Armpito, you hate pictures of lady gardens and titties but want to hear about a bloke wanking on the toliet. That weed has fucked you brain!!!! Have you every seen a real pair of titties? And your mums dont count

I got my husband into a barfight because some dude grabbed my ass. I wanted to stop the fight so I broke a chair over the guys on the ground unfortunately my husband was on top. Fighting still going on and I took a beer bottle threw an uppercut and got my husband again. He ended up with a shattered shoulder and broken jaw and two less teeth. To this day he does not know that his 3 major injuries were caused by Me. Oops..and that is why I stay with him. It's my guilt and I carry it.

I'm very allergic to mosquitos. I get one bite, and it turns into a blister. It's very painful. It looks like small pox. One night, i got wasted and feel asleep in a boat in my friend's yard. It was for sale. I woke up and my whole body was covered in blisters. I had hives, a huge rash and i was seeping puss everywhere. I don't know why i didn't think of that one last night. I don't even remember posting that shit. Fucking Tramadol.

when i was walking home drunk one night about half way there I starting running the rest of the way there cause i felt like it. At some point I stepted down awkwardly and hurt my ankle. It was sore for 2-3 days after, it hurt pretty bad right when I did it but I couldn't stop laughing.